You’ve found great success by thinking your way through problems. However, the issues you’re facing are becoming more complex, and your brain isn’t enough anymore. You can build trust with and between your heart, body, and brain by talking with them. That way, you can bring their combined strength and abilities to bear on solving your problems.
Start by becoming familiar with the steps.
Step 1: Settle
Find a place where you feel safe and comfortable and can be uninterrupted for about fifteen minutes.
Sitting usually works best at first. However, if you feel more stable in another posture or moving around, feel free to try that. So long as you are safe, comfortable, and stable, and you aren’t risking the safety of anyone around you.
Spend a minute or two settling in.
Feel where your body touches your surroundings. Listen to any sounds you hear. Smell the air and the scents it carries. See the colors, textures, and patterns around you.
Take a few deep breaths.
Step 2: Reach out
Reach out and gently touch the part of you with which you’re communing.
Do this physically, placing your hands on or over it.
Also, do this figuratively, by focusing your attention and awareness on it.
Now, gently say, “Hello.”
Step 3: Listen
Spend the next few minutes listening.
Be open to and curious about what you perceive.
What do you experience?
You may hear your part speak. You might see it in its physical form, an avatar, or even a color, texture, taste, or smell.
Whatever you experience, identify and acknowledge it.
Don’t try to record your experience. Try not to judge it. There’s no right or wrong here. Just what you’re experiencing.
Step 4: Inquire
Now, gently, ask, “What do you want me to know?”
As before, sit with your experience for a few minutes. Identify and acknowledge what you receive.
Then, stop. Even if you feel you can continue. You’ll have plenty of opportunities to experiment with longer durations.
Step 5: Withdraw
Finish up with a gentle “Thank you.”
Then, withdraw your attention and awareness back to yourself.
Step 6: Reflect
Now, take a last few minutes and reflect on your experience.
If you’ve been itching to record your experience, this is the time to do so.
Step 7: Take a break
While this process may seem simple, it can be intense.
Do something else for a few minutes.
Then, decide whether you’re done for now or ready for more.
Now that you are familiar with the steps to use, engage your heart, body, and mind in conversation.
Start by using the seven steps above to talk with your heart, body, and brain individually.
You use your brain and your body all the time. You may be less aware of your heart. So, start there.
You listen to your brain all the time. You may listen to your body less. So, it will come next.
While you often listen to your brain, you may talk with it less. Talk with it third.
As you progress through these conversations, notice where your experience changes.
Does talking with one feel different than talking with the others?
Does one show up differently than do the others?
Does one have a different voice, use different speech patterns, or use a different modality than do the others?
When you’re feeling comfortable talking with your heart, body, and brain individually, move on to talking with them in pairs.
First, invite your heart and your body into the same conversation.
Follow that by conversing with your heart and your brain.
Then, have a conversation with your body and your brain.
Again, notice where your experience is different from conversation to conversation.
Additionally, notice how your heart, body, and brain react to and interact with each other.
Are they gentle and encouraging with each other or rough and contemptuous—or rough yet encouraging?
Does one play the bully and another the victim?
When you’re feeling confident talking with your heart, body, and brain pairs, use the seven steps to bring all three into the same conversation.
As before, notice how your experience changes.
Also, notice how your heart, body, and brain react to and interact with each other, and how that has changed from the previous conversations.
If you haven’t already, note anything you’d like to change in these dynamics.
Conversation brings trust
Every time you talk with your heart, body, and brain—especially, when you do so with openness and curiosity, you build trust.
Trust between yourself and your heart, yourself and your body, and yourself and your brain.
Also, trust between your heart, your body, and your brain.
This increasing trust helps your heart, body, and brain work together. No longer does your brain need to carry the entire load.
With more points of view and more skillsets brought to bear, you can tackle your problems with increased ease.
How did this process go for you? Let me know in the comments!